I’m going into my cardio final and everything finally feels like it’s falling into a groove. Somewhat. I have to say school has been such an interesting process. Usually in pharmacy school you have your first year to acclimate to the doctoral program, its social settings, academics, and expectations. I feel that I fell two years behind, in that regard, because the first year was online. Then, I worked two jobs most of my second year.
Stephen and I have finally fallen into a groove of some sort between me studying all the time, or doing extracurricular activities, while he works. We’re getting into a new rhythm. Of course – it will probably be disrupted once I start my APPE clinical rotations full time. It’s been a nice and healthy transition having me focus on things I love again. Self-care felt like it flew out the door throughout all of 2019 going into half of 2022. The process of applying to programs, working endlessly, sitting in hour long commutes, was… exhausting. I personally felt like I could not stop the grind. As someone who loves to work and make money, it has been difficult for me to scale back and reallocate time to myself. After this, I have no intentions of being a student again, so I might as well bask in the joy of it.
The organization I started putting together my P1 year is finally in full gear. It has been such a beautiful, long, process, to see that vision come to light. I’ve had the most amazing people (board) help me put all of the moving pieces together. They are smart, kind, brilliant, and encouraging.
“None of us, including me, ever do great things. But we can all do small things, with great love, and together we can do something wonderful.” – Mother Teresa
I love this quote by Mother Teresa because it is genuinely so true. I wanted to just write a little bit, in between my studying sessions, to reflect on this year. To grapple with all of the mixed emotions that comes with being part of an intense doctoral program, and genuinely to just pat myself on the back. Especially as a first generation Hmong female whose pursuing a doctorates degree. It is egregious, exhausting, but fulfilling. There are so many more things still to be learned, and in life, you just have to make sure that you never lose your desire and drive to grow.