Remove toxicity.

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“Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light. Try not to take it personally.”
― Kamand Kojouri

I was an interim co-program director for a volunteer based non-profit organization the first seven months this year.  This took the majority of my time outside of work. I was asked to come on because their organization suffered tremendously the past four years and they wanted someone to come in to revitalize the programming of the organization.  There were a lot of red flags from the beginning but I knew my Co and I could complete great work together.  We did.

I learned a lot about myself through this process.  I grew a lot and developed an incredible backbone.

What did I learn:

  1. If the organization has been suffering under the same leadership for four years, and that leadership has not changed, do you think the organization will really change?
    • I learned to not let people exploit and bully me. I was sick of being bullied by insecure leaders.  I stood up to them, I did not let these people bully anyone I oversaw, and I let the truth speak for itself.  My co, staff and I transitioned out together and remain close friends/allies in one anothers’ life.  Curious about what insecure leadership looks like?
    • Click here to read up on it (safe link).
  2. Toxic people attract toxic people. Remove and cut them or they will spoil your soul.
    img_2205Signs of toxic people, here (safe link).
    • There were three particular individuals who did everything they could to cut, undermine, and compromise my leadership.  They wanted to control and bully me (and my co) to commit fraud, cheat, and lie.  These three people were heavily involved in the organization and wanted people to cover their dirty work.  Unbeknownst to them, I was not going to be the cover-upper (?).
    • Once I removed these toxic people, and set my boundaries, they knew the only way their silly games could continue was to remove everyone who had the same ethical moral grounds as me. Have you ever heard of the “law of attraction?”  There is truth in that. You’ll find that highly successful people usually attract highly successful people. You’ll find highly corrupt and immoral people will always flock together. That is not a coincidence.
    • You know where all of these toxic people are months later?  In the same place. Think about it.
  3. If people do not appreciate the quality of your work and time, move on.  Go somewhere your work is appreciated.  Take your money, time, and talents to a place – where it is actually appreciated. Time is money and money is time.
    • After ending my director position, I started volunteering at a local cancer garden.  I fund raised more money there, for that cause, in one month then any of the board members who previously oversaw the program I previously directed.  I am happy every day I volunteer because there is transparency with the money-cash flow, and my time is actually valued. Take your talents where it is appreciated. The rest will follow. Follow your gut reaction.
  4. If you’re not fighting for the little guy, then who is? Think about it.
  5. Karma will always catch up.
  6. Learn from the moments of weakness.  They are the moments that show people’s true character, and are the moments that build character.

Love,

Tee

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All photos, writings, poems, and opinions are my own.

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