Happiness is when

Something I’ve learned, over time, is that you can never control the way people choose to perceive you.  For many years, I cared way too much, about what others thought of me, and it killed me inside.  I sought approval because a huge part of me felt neglected.  I think most of that void stemmed from the love I always wanted from my mother.  It was a love she could not provide me.

I thought if I could be “successful,” accomplished, and poised she would love me.  In my life I would seek approval from others but feel a deep void, because I hated that it was not reflective of me as a whole person.  I based my happiness on other’s approval of me.  In this process I learned, others will always find something wrong with you, and to give someone that much leverage over your own happiness is foolish.  I was foolish, for many years, and chased unrealistic goals that did not reflect my true desires or happiness.  I bent over backwards for others and found my heart empty handed.

So what is happiness?  Happiness is putting yourself first.  When you are mentally and physically happy – others will feel your love.  There is always going to be someone who doesn’t like you and that’s okay.  Cut out the nay sayers and toxic people out of your life.  They are like leeches that poison your soul.  Never give someone power over you and never let someone make you feel helpless.  You are the author of your life narrative.

Much love,


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All photos, writings, poems, and opinions are my own.

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